Posts Tagged ‘self-help’

When Life Gives You Lemons: A Guide To Dealing With the Crap it Throws at You

Apr
18
2012

I started the new year with a resolution to be a more positive person. But we all know how those resolutions go. The last month, much less, the last year has been pretty tough on me. Having to deal with various unpleasant circumstances such as coping with the loss of a loved one, dealing with work-related stress, struggling with finances, and fighting to refrain from becoming a permanently bitter spinster who has no luck with romance.

After hearing some less than stellar news today at work, I’m thinking, “This is what I get for all the blood (literally, I suffered several paper-cuts), sweat and tears I put in?”. But, surprisingly I was kind of “meh” about it, which did wonders for my blood pressure.

Each and every one of us goes through failures, setbacks and negative situations in life. Some on a greater scale than others. But in order to get through life, you have to try not to let these “lemons” get to you.

If things aren’t going your way, then try to do something positive about it. Because if anyone’s going to change something about your life, it’s going to be you.

Wow, I sound like Tony Robbins. Didn’t mean to sound so preachy there, but you get the point.

5 Things NOT to do When You’re Feeling Down

  1. Don’t engage in any high-risk or potentially reckless activities. So car surfing, bungee jumping, sky-diving without a parachute is out of the question, mainly because where does safety come into play when you’re down in the dumps about living your life?
  2. Don’t Take a stroll down Memory Lane by looking at old photos and reminiscing about how good life was/what might have been/how skinny you were/how hot your ex was. It’s only going to lead to trouble, because at times we can be our own worse enemies.
  3. Don’t drown your sorrows by raiding the liquor cabinet. Alcohol is just going to make all your issues seem a lot bigger and sadder than they really are, especially if you’re drinking all by your lonesome in the middle of the night. Self-medicating is never a good thing.
  4. Don’t sit on your couch eating an entire tub of triple-chocolate-fudge-N-brownie-cookie-dough ice cream while watching sappy movies. A lot of people tend to overeat when they’re upset. Having a food binge will probably make you even more upset than you are after you realize how much you ate. Besides, your stomach will hate you in the morning.
  5. Don’t post ambiguous status updates on Facebook, Twitter or other social media site as a cry for attention. You know what I’m talking about: those vague, over-the-top statement by Ms. Drama Queen like, “FML! How can someone be so heartless?!“, and then a bunch of concerned friends will post comments asking what happened and if they’re okay, but our poster would never exactly indicate what actually happened to her in order to be in that funk (will usually reply with something like “it’s personal, I don’t really want to talk about it”). Geez… what happened to the time when people used diaries to express their innermost thoughts and feelings?

Now you know what you shouldn’t be doing when you’re feeling down in the dumps. Here are some tips on what you should be doing in order to make yourself feel better

5 Things to do to Get Happy

  1. Learn to love yourself. When things are not going the way that you would like, it’s difficult not to find a way to blame yourself or thing that there’s something wrong with you. Go easy on yourself. People make mistakes, plain and simple (that’s how we learn from them). Things happen. That’s life.
  2. Talk to someone you trust. Be it a family member or friend (or if you’re spiritual, God or Baby Jesus), by letting your thoughts and feelings out and having a positive discussion, you’ll remember that people do care about you. Don’t want to talk about it? Then just enjoy spending time with that special someone.
  3. Embrace change. There are things in life that we can’t do anything about, and there’s things that we can. Accept what you can’t and move forward. This change could also stem to your environment: if you’re surrounded by piles of bills, papers and clutter, organizing it will help you breathe and relax.
  4. Take a breather. When you feel disappointed about something, take a step back from the situation and attempt to clear your mind about it. Do something you enjoy such as taking a jog in the park, painting on that old art easel that’s been collecting dust, or blasting some music and dancing like you’re an extra in a music video.
  5. Be good to your body. Get off that sofa and exercise, for goodness sake. Whether it’s in front of your Wii, or at the gym. The endorphins released though exercise help trigger a positive, happy feeling in the body. Sleep is another important aspect: Getting your required 7-8 hours per night, or at least take a nap during the day, can do wonders for your mood (who wants to talk to Cranky McCrankerson anyways?) Also remember to eat right. Healthy(ish) meals at even times throughout the day (say goodbye to those 2a.m. full course meals.)

Closing Thoughts
This is just a post to make you think about how you may be reacting to all those disappointments that may come your way. I’m not an expert psychologist or self-help guru, but hopefully these tips had some kind of effect on you if you’re struggling with all the lemons in your life.

Don’t let things get you down! If you’re at a low point then just think that thing can only go up from there. It’s a part of life, and why spend your life feeling sorry for yourself, when you can be happy that you’re alive and a lot better off then millions of other people on this earth.

So the next time life tosses you lemons, use them to start a lemonade stand. Then with the profits buy a military-grade bazooka, and then see if life makes that same mistake twice.